One of the tell tale signs of whether or not we’re growing in our walk with Christ, is how we interact with each other.
It’s not that our relationships with each other are more important than our relationship with Christ, but that our relationships with each other reflect our relationship with Christ. The love we have for one another (ya know, that thing that outsiders are supposed to know us by? - John 13:35) is a bi-product of our relationship with the Lord.
We say we love Jesus, and we usually do. But how can one truly love Jesus, above all things, and still shun his brothers in Christ? Maybe shun is too harsh a word; how about just being indifferent toward each other.
Hession says on page 44, first paragraph:
"Sin always involves us in being unreal, pretending, duplicity, window dressing, excusing ourselves and blaming others—and we can do all that as much by our silence as by saying or doing something."
I’ve heard many excuses: “I’ve been hurt”, “that guy’s a hypocrite”, “they don’t need me”, “I’m too busy to invest in anyone else’s life”, “I have a hard enough time keeping myself straight, I’d just be a menace if I try to speak into someone else’s life”, and on and on the excuses flow.
Don’t get me wrong, all of those things may have some actual truth to them. But the question we must ask ourselves is, “what does the Lord expect of me?” And to answer that, or any other answer, we must go back to the Scripture.
Observation:
I think that much of the time, one of the top reasons men will not open up to other men, and why they will not go out of their way to correct, or admonish, or even exhort other brothers in Christ, is because deep down we still have this innate tendency to not want to open our self up to the same scrutiny. In short, if I correct someone else, I’m going to have to apply that correction to my own life.
Hession touches on this in the book, on pages 46-47, saying:
This means that we must be as willing to hear and know the truth about ourselves from others as we are to hear and know it from God. We must be prepared for fellow believers to hold the light to us and challenge us in love about anything seen in our lives that is not the highest—and we must be willing to do the same service in return.
So the primary question for me becomes:
“Am I as willing to hear the truth about myself from another brother as I am to hear it from God”?
And how about my wife? There is NOBODY more qualified to tell me what I should and shouldn’t be doing than my wife, because she is one with me, part of me in
This fellowship that Christ has designed in His Church does two things for us:
1. It reflects our relationship with our Lord:
This is circular. If your relationship with Him is suffering, it will likely go bad between you and other brothers. And if your relationship with other brothers is strained, it’s likely that your relationship with the Lord may be suffering.
And finally, it’s impossible to have a good Godly relationship with each other, without first having a right relationship with Jesus Christ.
2. It strengthens our relationship with our Lord:
Think about it: Where better to be influenced by the goodness of God and the wholesome characteristics of Christ and His likeness, than to be in the midst of like minded people who aren’t cussing, drinking, devising evil, laughing at lewd things, etc.?
And Satan knows all of this very well; and he’s very good at pitting us against each other. And sometimes, he doesn't even have to influence us, but all he does is agree with our flesh that it’s a good idea to distance ourselves from one another. But that’s just another one of his lies!
Practical Biblical Thoughts (not in particular order):
1. Constant renewal and devotion to Jesus Christ; Daily, often, praying for all things at all times, for all saints.
2. SIN! Be aware of sin lurking at every corner; not to make it your focus, but being prepared, such as wearing the armor instead of carrying it around in a bag or marveling about how wonderful it looks hanging on your wall!
3. Take sin seriously. This is like the last one, but a bit different in that our flesh makes it easy for us to lower our standards and excuse some sin as harmless or “insignificant”, or “minor”, but the Biblical truth is, that the very smallest of sins KILLS! For that reason, it might take that item above - renewal - to get us back on track where the Lord wants us to be.
4. Take a chance; open yourself up to another guy and offer to him that you’re looking for an accountability partner; I won’t lie to you-it will be awkward (at first). But when you get to know each other and then you begin to challenge each other to get closer to Christ, the blessings will blow your mind!
Thoughts, comments, and corrections welcome!